New addition!

 On July 12th we welcomed our second son to the world. It was a difficult pregnancy and one I didn't feel comfortable sharing with the world (at least this portion of the world). He is happy and incredibly healthy. Now that he is here safe and sound, A and I will be continuing our normal lifestyle (hooray!) once the doctor gives me the go ahead. Four more weeks to go. :)

Be back soon.....

It's been a very very very long time since I have had anything to say. I will be back. I have made a promise to myself and to Him that I will start writing again. Just need to figure out where to start.

Limbo

I feel like I owe everyone an apology, maybe I don't but it will make me feel better. I have lots of things to say and stories to tell and things to bitch about but none of that has made its way here. Things between A and I are....weird. We are stuck in limbo and not sure where to go from here. We have some very new developments in our relationship and I don't think either one of us is ready to settle back into our normal life. When we do, I'm sure ill be overflowing with stories and such, but until then, I'm keeping it to myself until Im ready to share.

Everything is fine, we are very happy and very much still in love. It's nothing bad, just complicated.

So, in the meantime, hang in there (if anyone is still reading) I will be back soon and better than ever.

Lots of love and happy kinky thoughts, T.

Thief

I stole this from Fondles, who stole it from Sunny,  who stole it from PK. LOL. So we all have a little thief in us. :)

Here is the rules: answer truthfully but only Yes or No. Can't explain the answer unless someone asks. Which is fine too. Pass it on!

Taken a picture naked? Yes

Made money illegally? No

Had a one night stand? Yes

Been in a fist fight? No

Slept with your best friend? Yes

Had sex in a public place? Yes

Ditched work to have sex? Yes

Slept with a member of the same sex? Yes

Seen someone die? Yes

Ran from the police? Yes

Woke up somewhere and not remember how you got there? Yes

Worn your partners unmentionables? Yes

Fallen asleep at work? Yes

Used toys in the bedroom? Yes

Ran a red light? Yes

Been fired? Yes

Been in a car accident? Yes

Pole danced or done a striptease? Yes

Loved someone you shouldn't? Yes

Sang karaoke? Yes

Done something you told yourself you wouldn't? Yes

Laughed so hard you peed your pants? No

Caught someone having sex? Yes

Kissed a perfect stranger? Yes

Shaved your partner? Yes

Given your private parts a nickname? Yes

Ever gone in public without underwear? Yes

Had sex on a roof top? No

Played chicken? No

Mooned/flashed someone? Yes

Do you sleep naked? Yes

Blacked out from drinking? Yes

Felt like killing someone? Yes

Had sex more than 5 times in one day? Yes

Been with someone because they were in a band? No

Taken 10 shots of liquor in a day? Yes

Shot a gun? Yes

Gone outside naked? Yes

Have fun!

P.S. Oh and I just had to share this with everyone because its too good not to.

I was texting A to let Him know that my ass wasn't happy with Him from His anal assault on me the other night. I pressed the send key, and then died a thousand deaths as I saw that I accidentally sent it to my coworker! Oops.

Always check the recipient before sending. :0

Forced pleasure

It started like any other night, I slept downstairs so that we could have some alone time after A got home from work. I was told to go to bed naked, which is a huge thrill to be told that you can't wear any clothing. Freeing and controlling all in one yummy little package. Later I woke to A scooting me over to make room on the bed. (I tend to be a bed hog when given the chance). Spooning against my back A told me of His night at work while running His hands over my warm skin. I was in a sleepy haze till His strokes became more demanding. Him squeezing my breasts and palming my ass gave a kick start to that needy ache I've been carrying for the last week. I needed some attention and the look in His eyes told me I wouldn't be left hungry for more.

With a smack on the ass and His mouth close to my ear He told me to touch myself and I don't need to be told twice. My fingers played over my clit as He sharply spanked my ass sending a heat wave through my body. I hadn't been spanked in over a week and the body tends to readjust quickly but not as quickly as I hoped. Each spank was like the first time, the sharp bite, the cracking sound ringing in my ears, and the warming glow that I was sure had begun to spread over my cheeks.

There is an undeniable high that I feel every time A spanks me that is as addicting as any drug. The pain and the pleasure twist together making it hard to breath. With each breath a pant I could feel my orgasm start to peak. He must have known too because He beat a rhythm on my ass in tune to the waves of my orgasm, each blow taking my breath away as I tried to cry out with sweet release.

Barely a second to catch my breath and A had pushed me into the mattress, His arm resting on my back as His other hand parted my thighs. Cupping my sex in His hand, He started to rub my now sensitized clit with His talented fingers, His thumb resting on my pussy lips just close enough to make me squirm. His fingers massaging me, making that delicious peak grow once again. The man sure does know how to work me over. As my orgasm rose and crashed over me He pressed Him arm across my shoulder blades pinning me down. A challenge and a command in the same move. Almost willing me to stay still and surrender but also challenging me to try and escape. I had no intentions of trying to get away, yet.

His hand once again found my now wet pussy and proceeded to smack my swollen lips sending a jolt through my body. Sliding a finger deep into me, He worked my sweet spot knowing it makes me melt into a hot mess. Moaning loudly against the sheets I thrust my hips towards Him out of blind need. Fucking myself against Him I quickly orgasmed again. It was there and then just as fast was over.

Like a possessed man He gave me no rest before adding a second then third finger filling me up and driving me insane with lust. Forcing me to orgasm
Again...

And again...

And again...

Finally I couldn't take anymore, I had nowhere to escape to, but a never ending orgasm that kept pulling me under. I was a panting and quivering ball of nerves. I begged A to please fuck me, to just stop His assault on me. Giving in He pressed His rock hard length against my abused pussy, easily sliding in to the very depth of me. His thighs on either side of mine, trapping me once again as He pumped into me. It felt so good to have Him inside of me, rocking into me, forcing me over the edge with His thick cock. I thought He might be getting close but I never got the chance to ride it out as He pulled Himself free and rubbed the plump head against my ass. I knew instantly what He wanted and that I didn't have a choice. Needing no extra lubrication He pushed into my ass slowing when I gave a whimper but not stopping till He was all the way in. Flexing his cock and savoring the tight grip I had on Him, He pulled out only to shove back in. Back and forth, using my body as His own personal fuck toy. The deeper He went the more I wanted, I was soon forcing myself back on Him to get more. Slamming against my ass He came with a groan as He pulsed deep inside me.

We both collapsed on the bed, both too tired and spent to do anything other than breath. I couldn't move or think, my body having raised the white flag of defeat. I had literally been fucked senseless, and it was great :)

Wicked Wednesday and His birthday

Today is His birthday and to make things easier I am going to start referring to Him as A. He is an amazing man that has made me so very happy. He tries His hardest to give me everything I could ever want and that makes the man a saint because I'm not the easiest person to love. He always has the right answer when I ask if I'm fat or if my outfit looks good. There is so much that women put men through, I'm surprised He hasn't wanted to dump me off a bridge yet. So, happy birthday my love. Your my perfect man.

On the topic of Wicked Wednesday, this week is our homemade riding crop. Now I know that crops aren't usually made out of duct tape but who doesn't love duct tape? Its the most useful invention ever made. It can seal boxes for moving or hold your bumper onto your car (I have actually had to do that) or be used to make a nifty little spanking implement. All I used was a piece of dowel rod and good ole duct tape. I thought the blue/green and black combo was cool so that's what I went with. It can really sting if that's the goal or can make nice little love taps. Plus its very easy to aim.

Hopefully I'll be on the receiving end of His birthday spankings. :)

Happy Spanking!

Acceptance

There is something that has been bouncing around my head the last few days and this seems to be my best outlet. There is a wonderful community of people on here that offer sympathy, acceptance, advice and a good dose of humor. Being accepted is a huge thing for me, and maybe it shouldn't be. At least I know that on here I don't have to worry about putting up a shield. I can be myself and wave my freak flag with pride. People in the real world aren't as welcoming, which is an awful shame.

Where am I going with this.....?

Oh yes, acceptance. One of the many things that I need to self improve on is to accept myself for who I am.

1. I like to be spanked when I do something wrong...or right depending on the situation.

2. I want to please Him in all ways, at all times, even when I'm being bratty.

3. I want to wear a symbol of my submission to Him because He owns me, whether He knows it or not.

4. I want to feel His dominance over me and know its because he loves and cherishes me and wants me to grow to be a better person.

5. I want to be everything He could ever want sexually and spiritually.

All these things make it hard to convince myself that it's okay for me to be the way I am. I don't want to change, ever. I am very happy in this lifestyle, the happiest I've ever been. I would be crushed if we ever went back to the way it was before. I would survive and still love Him desperately but I would be holding back a large part of myself.

Where is all this introspect coming from?

There has been a couple times now that He has used His belt to collar me while we are having sex and it's wonderful and kinky but I'm worried about marks and bruises that may come from this. He has known from the very beginning that I enjoy a good dose of kink. I guess it just got me thinking back to wearing a symbol of my submission to Him. We don't have anything like that and I don't know if He would ever come to that decision alone anyway. He had talked about starting to have me kneel next to Him while watching tv wearing His belt as a collar, which pleased me to no end. I love when He tells me His plans for me. It's just one of the many parts of His dominance that makes me feel owned. I guess that is what the goal really is, not just the spanking and sex but the ownership. Knowing the I belong to Him because he accepts who I am and the things that I need. So to satisfy my curiosity I took the the vast depths of the Internet to see what kind of symbols are out there.

Some things I am sure of:

Spiked collars are not my thing, I'd probably end up stabbing myself or hurting Him.

I will not get the word "slave" tattooed on my body, I've gone this long without tattooing something I will regret. I do however have a tattoo in mind but that's another story.

I will not do or wear anything in public that would out me to my family or coworkers. I don't really care if my friends know, but outside of them, it's no ones business.

I will not do anything permanent, people change and I'm not much of a optimist as far as relationships go.

So basically I am left with one option. A collar (a discreet one) or other jewelry that can be removed if necessary. We have not had this discussion as of yet but I'm sure we will soon. I did find this one which I love Stealth collar

Who else is collared or wears a symbol? How did that come about and are you happy with it?